July 2008 - Independence is Grand
I realized, while celebrating our country's Independence Day, I was also celebrating my own independence, my own freedom. For the first time in years I saw myself free from the responsibilities of raising children, free from the duties of taking care of a husband, free from addictions and free to do what ever I please. What a wonderful place to be.
My sons boys are still very much a part of my life, but, at least they are responsible for themselves now. I just got a phone call from my youngest son, Jason, in the British Virgin Islands. He wanted to let me know, despite the beauty and lore of the islands, he was definitely coming back to finish his master's degree at Cornell...thank God he is making responsible decisions:)
I spent this past weekend with my oldest son, Joshua, in Orlando, helping him study for his midterms. He'll have his associates degree soon. We were able to go to Disney to watch the fireworks display choreographed to music around the lake. The energy was electric, the ooooooos and ahhhhhhhhhs were almost as loud as the BOOMS and there were even a few tears besides my own when they played God Bless America. I am so glad Disney hasn't banned God from their celebrations !
The day after the 4th I was invited, spur of the moment, like most everything in my life, to go for a speedboat ride around the lake I had watched the fireworks around. Sure, I was already in my bathing suit. We jumped in the car and picked up some other folks and I found out I would be driving my own boat. Hmmm, that didn't sound like as much fun as riding, but I was game.
Les, who owns a corrall where Red and I rode horses, called while I was on the way to Disney. I laughed and told him what I was getting ready to do and told him, "I guess the speed boats won't sense my fear so they won't buck me like the horses used to" ! Hmmm, another thing I would be in control of, I liked that.
I drove around the lake just like I was a pro, well, maybe not as fast as a pro, but I enjoyed the wildlife, the other happy boaters and was able to keep up with the rest of the group:) Another perfect day in the life of Diane.
I had plans on Sunday to go to a Spiritualist church in Orlando. Now, I am not a regular "church-goer". I do an hour of devotions every morning and pretty much live in a walking prayer (or walk in a living prayer:), but the weekend I had spent with the psychic-healing group had piqued my interest in Spirituality. Spiritualists study the laws of nature to facilitate healing. Sounds good to me.
I got the directions off of the NASC.org site (National Association of Spiritualist Churches) and packed my bags. I would be leaving right after the service to head towards home. My river house is rented right now, but I would be staying in my local area till I could "check in" to my beautiful home on Tuesday.
Well, as it can be with directions from the Internet, they were incomplete. I was looking for North Chickasaw Drive in Orlando and could only find the southern version. I decided to make use of my free cell minutes and call my friend, Karen, in the Keys. I drove looking for the "North-part" of this road while we chatted. She said, "There's a psychic-spiritualist community somewhere around Orlando".
As soon as she said that, I remembered a friend who had been commissioned to write a song for the community she was talking about. The name means, "rocks under the water" (you know-even tho we can't see them they are there:) but neither of us could remember the name of the place. I decided, when I got gas, if the attendant knew where it was, then that would be where I would go. If they didn't, then I would head west, towards home. Now, I would guess-timate probably less than 5% of the people in Orlando would have any clue of what I was talking about, so I wasn't going to hope too hard. If it was meant to be, it would happen.
I pumped my gas and went in to use the rest room, came out and stood in front of the counter and said to the woman cashier, "I'm not sure if you can help me, but there is a psychic/spiritualist community somewhere near Orlando". She smiled and said, "Yes, Cassadaga, my husband is pagan priest, it's north-west of here-just take route 4". Now, dear readers, don't get worried-pagans celebrate nature too:) There are lots of "religions" out there which make very interesting study courses.
So, I was on my way to Cassadaga, "rocks below the water". I found it easliy and parked in the last parking place in the 3 block area considered the "welcome center". I walked into the gift shop and picked up a "birth card" for myself and was drawn to the back of the building. I assume spirit was leading me because, once I stood in front of the brochures on courses, I could hear voices around the corner. A young couple walked up behind me and I heard the store clerk say to them, "Wait until that speaker is done and then go ahead in". I had walked in just in time for their Sunday Sessions!
Once that speaker was done, I followed the young couple in and found a seat amongst the 130 or more people already there. The next medium got up, and asked if anyone would like a reading. A few of us lifted our hands and he picked a woman on the other side of the room, read the spirits in her aura, telling her what he saw and what their messages were for her (just like I had been doing at the weekend retreat) and then he asked for other volunteers. My hand went up again and he picked on me immediately. "What is your first name?" he asked."Diane" I answered. "Is Johnson your last name?" he asked. "No, but that's close" was my answer. He went on to say he saw a gentleman standing with me, the man had a great sense of humor while he was in this earth plane, the kind of guy you liked after spending 3 minutes with him. I smiled and told him I knew who he was speaking of...never feed the medium but keep the energy active between you. This man's message for me, "He is very proud of you. You have accomplished alot since he has been gone, things you were working on while he was here".
Yes, I had, I didn't tell him but I had quit smoking cigarettes and quit drinking too much alcohol in front of everyone. Didn't need to feed the medium or potentially embarass myself. Even though I am proud of what I have accomplished, some people are judgemental. Greg, the medium, went on, "He is also telling me something about a show you watch. There is something to be learned from that show" when I wasn't receptive to this-I don't watch TV-he went on to tell a story about the book he had just received as a gift about reading auras. I missed the name of it, so I went up after the presentation to talk to him some more. I wanted the name of the book and to see if I could get anymore info about the TV show. He gave me the name of the book and then said, "It's something about what you do, you need to take a lesson from the show. Something about eating better or taking better care of yourself."
I thanked him and realized I hadn't eaten all day and it was 2pm. So, I picked up the book, their last copy, about auras in the book shop along with a pamphlet about Casssadaga and decided to have a bite to eat at the cafe. I opened the pamphlet and read about it's history and remembered the story from my songwriting friend. George had a vision while living in New York about starting this community and fulfilled his dreams. Ahhh, dreams are essential.
The girl brought my chicken quesadia in no time at all, so, I decided to eat my lunch and open the book to see if I was drawn to see a psychic while I was there. Of course, I opened the book and there she was, in the middle of the page with one of those butterflies Red keeps sending me. I was going to call but decided to just get in my car and go. I drove right to the home of Hazel West. She had slept late as she had been up all night, consoling a friend, and asked me to sit in her waiting room filled with books. She gave me a couple to read, both were marked with chapters about her. I was delighted. Red's butterfly had led me to someone with experience and compassion.
She sensed a man-spirit present who had died of a heart attack, who had alot of trouble clearing his throat. Red was always going to have that throat thing checked out, but never did. She felt as though he died instantly, unexpectedly, and she kept feeling like she was falling. She immitated the way he died as closely as anyone could have. He was holding himself up with his arms when he died and she demonstrated it. I told her later we were actually making love and she said, "when he died, he fell through you. His spirit is closer to you than anyone else I have read in a long, long time."
She read my handwriting, it told her I was not the kind of person who allowed anyone to make me do things I didn't want to do. I was strong and hard working, accomplished alot in my life and was going to accomplish alot more. I had alot of wisdom. She laid color samples out on a tray and asked me to turn them over in whatever way I was moved to do so and then she asked me to do it again, while she wrote the order down. From turning the black over first, the first time, and second the second time, she "saw" that I had experienced death not only in a shocking way but from someone I loved very much. From turning red and yellow over together each time, she read I was bold and did and said things spur of the moment. She's right, just ask my friends. I don't hold back when spirit moves me to speak or act.
She explained my birth number-it is the addition of the numbers in the date of your birthday, and generally defines your character. She is a 6 and so am I. A 6 wants to help everyone all the time. Right again. She saw a woman, a relative on my mother's side, with a name beginning with El..., someone I had gotten my name from and another one beginning with an Mar... The El...is my mother's mother Elizabeth, from which I get my middle name, and the Mar would be Margaret, or Aunt Peggy, who taught me how to have fun in the woods of Maine. Or it could be my great-great grandmother Margaret, a full blooded Indian. She explained even though I didn't know the ancestors on both my mother's and father's side, they were all here, helping me. Hey, can't we all use as much help as we can get:)
As the reading went on, I began to share things with Hazel. I told her I had been to psychics and was learning about how to listen to spirits and that maybe I was there to learn from her. She told me she would teach me and she was one of 2 people who had learned from Bull, I think was his name. I'll find out more the next time I am there. I knew it was getting late and I needed to head west, so I told her I would be back. She gave me a book recently written on "Natural Laws", and thanked me for finding her. She said Red told her the music on the other side comes out exactly the way you want it to sound. No mistakes. Also, he wanted me to know his music is timeless and it will be used in movies. Ok, I'll make it a priority.
I laughed and told her Red had led me to her. Of this, I have no doubt. The ride going west was not a pretty one, filled with thunderstorms and wrong turns, but I enjoyed every minute of it. I arrived at the bar I was supposed to meet my friends at an hour after they had left and that was ok with me. I don't need to sit in bars at the end of a perfect day. It's easeir not to drink too much if you aren't sitting in a bar:) I also couldn't reach the people I was supposed to stay with and decided to spend the night in Chiefland. I called the Best Western and they wanted 70 bucks so I opted for the mattress on the floor at The Center where I teach yoga. I walked in the front door and heard a loud buzzing in the back and knew something was wrong, some motor was burning out. I walked back and turned on the light and saw the fountain was empty. If it had gone on much longer it would have burnt out and possibly caught on fire. Perfect, I saved the fountain, possibly the building and was able to get on line to write down what's been happening in this wonderful, crazy journey I call My Life. Amen !