April 16, 2008…….PRJ 36 and Time to Get Away
I just got home from a night of working with Dave on PRJ36-the first 2 sets of the GREAT NIGHT at the Hog. It took 4 computers and 5 hours but we finally were able to burn a couple of CDs I can take south with me next week for Bruce to hear. I was so glad to have a great night of the Bruce and Red Show recorded.
When I listened to it I cried as I remembered the night it was recorded. Bruce and Red were getting to play with some musicians who had never played with them before and wanted them to hear their arrangements, not only for Bruce’s original music but for some of the more popular songs they did. They were definitely a one of a kind band.
The fact they never meant for it to be distributed for sale allowed them to have fun with the crowd. They were laid back and the chatter between the songs was hilarious! They were not only known for the great music and the energy they played with on the stage but for their interaction with their friends and fans. Everyone loved them. I laughed when I heard Red joking about my sister and the Red Sox, each of my sons and their professions and about having a beer delivered by the beautiful woman at the end of the bar. I laughed and I cried throughout the 4 hour recording and went back in time to a wonderful night at the Hog.
It was exciting for me to finally be able to get this recording from July of 2007 on a CD. I had been battling with software problems and working with the manufacturer online. They explained after many downloads and suggestions there was nothing they could do for me.
Dave had a recording studio and had told me at Red’s service in Cross City, “If there’s anything I can do for you, give me a call.” So I did. He was eager to help.
Dave shared with me how he felt he had met Red at just the right time and the right place. He recalled that day at the music store;
“I was sitting talking with the owner of Dixie Music in Old Town when two guys came in looking for strings. I listened to them talk for a couple of minutes and realized they were the “Bruce and Red” duo I had been watching on the Internet at The Hogs Breath and talking to in their blog on their website. I piped up, ‘You must be Red from the Hogs Breath and Red replied, ‘You must be Dave from Trenton.’”
Dave went on laughing and talking about the meeting and how he had told Red he was looking for an excuse to get out of town for a few days. When Red said they were playing in Destin at the Hogs Breath Dave said, “I’ll be there!”
I smiled as I remembered that day very clearly. Red had called me to ask me again exactly where the music store was. He’d gone in the wrong direction the first time.
Then he called me after he left the music store laughing and saying, “I guess you are right with your ‘supposed-to-be-stuff’. If I hadn’t taken the wrong turn the first time I might not have finally met Dave from Trenton at the music store.”
He went on to tell me he had invited him to come up to Destin to finally see Bruce and Red in person instead of listening to them on the Internet. He’d told Dave I would be there on Friday night and Dave said there was a special girl up there he wanted to see and we could all sit together.
Dave and I agreed, they’d met at just the right time, the right place. He felt he had come into Red’s life so he could help me with this project. I was so thankful for those “chance meetings” in life.
I figured I would catch up on a few emails and listen to a little of Red’s original music before I went to bed. I was typing the words “a week from today” to my new friend Rose. As I typed it Red sang, “a week to the day”. I am sometimes startled when things like that happen but I smile and thank Spirit World for the “hello.” It has occurred throughout my life but is definitely happening more and more frequently. They are there trying to help us if we only open up our hearts, our ears, our eyes and our minds.
A few nights ago I was really pushing hard looking through photos and trying to get my house into some sort of order. I got to the point where I just was working myself too hard looking for too many messages and waiting for answers that didn’t seem to be coming. I realized I needed to get back into my going with the flow attitude. I needed to let go of trying so hard to figure things out and just work and laugh and live.
Sometimes I feel like he is here and I wonder whether it’s healthy for me to feel and think that so strongly. But I guess I have to accept whatever happens and realize what I think is up to me.
I remember I was tired and thinking I’d better get to bed soon. I looked at a photo and decided this photo was absolutely the last one I would touch tonight. There was a piece of paper underneath it I’d never seen before. It was in Red’s handwriting and I didn’t have my glasses so I had to squint to read it.
It said, “Did you ever get the feeling deep inside, that an old friend’s coming back to say hello, you sit and think as time goes by, then realize you are all done, was he really there, or is he really gone.”
I had goosebumps and sensed there was going to be another message coming and knew I needed to listen more closely to the meditation CD playing in the living room. The next line I heard was the Native Americans chanting, “You should listen to all those who have passed before you.”
As if this wasn’t enough, I turned over the paper in my hand to read the lyrics to Walk in Jerusalem with Jesus and John. Just an hour earlier I’d written to my psychic friend to ask him if Mormons believed in Jesus. I think it would be safe to say the chances of me finding another paper belonging to Red with lyrics about Jesus were slim to none.
I consider these uncanny coincidences as proof to me something or somebody is trying to talk to me. I choose to call it Spirit World and right now it was coming through loudly and clearly. That night’s message was it was ok to be listening to and watching for messages from other dimensions. After all, they are trying to help us accomplish our goals. Why not take all the help we can get?
April 19th, Saturday
Red’s only been gone about 5 months and I am so glad I stopped keeping exact count. I think it was just yesterday when I realized I didn’t know exactly how many weeks he had been gone. I was sitting on my porch talking with Rose #2, my new friend from the séance, when I said, “Oh my God. I am not sure how many weeks ago he died.” She told me it was ok. I have to number the Roses right now as 3 new ladies with the name Rose came into my life in the same week. I guess that would mean everything’s coming up roses.
After she left I cleaned the house a little and cried a little; sorry to leave my home but happy to have a home to leave, ready to go on a trip! A change of scenery would do me a world of good. I would be spending a month away from home this time, helping with the Hogsbreath100 sailboat race from Islamorada to Key West then a song writers’ fest in Key West. I’d also be working on promoting my newest idea to help people heal, www.Dianes Detox.com sounded like an easy to remember name for a website to put my time into.
I spoke to my father in law a couple of days ago and he said his daughter and her family would be visiting with them in Ocala. I hadn’t seen them since they were down for her brother’s funeral in November so I made it a point to work around their schedule.
I went to sleep looking forward to seeing Red’s family and getting out of my house for the next month. I awoke refreshed and ready to hit the road. I finished packing and called my father in law to let him know I was getting ready to head for their house and ask him what time lunch was.
Apparently, he’d gotten his days mixed up and his daughter’s family was still in Epcot. He asked if I would like to wait until tomorrow and I heard myself say, “No, I have to be in Del Ray tomorrow. You say they are in Epcot? Let me see if I can reach my son and if I can get a pass into the park I’ll meet them for lunch.” I realized the chances of reaching my son this early in the morning were not favorable but decided to try anyway.
Josh answered the phone and was working lunch at MGM studios so it was easy for him to meet me. I called my father in law back to let him know I was heading to Epcot to spend a little time with his daughter and her family. He was glad I could see them and gave the phone to my mother in law.
We had a pleasant and very long conversation. I explained to her I was sorry not to be stopping there to see them but I really wanted to see the nieces.
As I was driving towards Epcot I recalled the first time I met my sister in law and her family. She had just given birth to twin girls. Red had kept me informed through out her labor and delivery exactly when I was going to be an “aunt.” We had only known each other less than 3 weeks when the girls were born but Red already knew he was going to marry me. I met his family in Long Island, New York when the girls were 2 weeks old on the way to visit my family in New England; such wonderful times, such wonderful memories.
I arrived at Disney World glad to see my oldest son. I knew he was going through another difficult time in his life, breaking up is hard to do. He said he hadn’t slept well but had done his yoga, eaten a good breakfast of fruit and yogurt and was doing the best he could. My heart went out to him. At least he knew taking care of himself would help his attitude and he has a great job so things could be a lot worse. He’s been working The Brown Derby Restaurant for more than three years now. He has been filmed for promotions on programs about The Derby’s famous “Cobb Salad” on the Food Network station. He’s won awards for best server so many times they finally had to invent an award for him; the best server ever in any of the Disney Parks. I am so proud of him. He gave me a hug and my pass and I headed off to find my in-laws.
My cell phone rang and I was pleasantly surprised to see my sister in law was returning my call. When I answered, she too, was pleasantly surprised she had cell service in the park. I laughed and told her she had service because I needed to find out where she thought she would be in about 45 minutes. I had gotten a pass from my son and was heading out of MGM’s parking lot on my way to Epcot. We agreed to meet in “China.” Sounded like Chinese food for lunch.
As I walked in to the park I had to choose which direction to go around the globe to head towards the lake. I chose the road to the left and then took a wrong turn that brought me further away from the lake. My wrong turn was actually a right turn; it led me directly to this month’s special exhibit; Butterflies from around the world. Red was telling me he was here with me. It felt so good.
I started taking photos of butterflies and thinking about how happy I was to be alive. I realized if Red were still alive my life would be entirely different. I thought for just a moment where I might be and then decided to turn back to living and being happy in the moment. This wasn’t a good time to dream about another life, another time.
I made my way to the Chinese restaurant where they were all waiting for me. We hugged and I attempted to have a conversation with each of them but as usual everyone was talking over the other. We decided to head off in the direction of Japan so they could get more food. I prefer sushi to Chinese food so whatever they wanted was fine with me.
We stopped on the way to play drums and laughed and played several songs. With two of them in wheelchairs it was a bit difficult to get around so sitting and playing drums was great fun.
Red’s sister spoke to me of some troublesome times when they were kids. I put my hand on her shoulder and walked beside her in her wheelchair while she cried and talked about her brother. I consoled her and said he was here with us now.
We stopped to watch some Japanese dancers and I realized my in-laws were in no hurry to eat. They had just had a snack while waiting for me at the Chinese restaurant. I could feel my blood sugar dropping as I hadn’t eaten solid food yet today. I drank my protein shake before I hit the road and it was already mid afternoon. I find when I am eating nutrient rich foods I skip meals because I am simply not hungry, then, it hits me. My stomach says, “Feed me NOW.” I excused myself and told them I would meet them inside the restaurant.
I stood in line and read the menu overhead. When I arrived at the counter I ordered a Tokyo sushi roll and was told they had no sushi. I took a deep breath and ordered the teriyaki chicken. I had eaten chicken the past two days and was trying to convince myself the chicken would be good when another woman appeared saying, “The sushi rolls just arrived.” I changed my order and smiled and thought, “Thank you, Universe.”
I ate my sushi rolls and shared four of them with the hungry twins. Their mom and dad went in to order noodles while I sat and watched all the children playing around the pond behind the restaurant.
One of the twins yelled at her sister and then yelled at some kids who were playing too close to the pond. I explained to her she could talk in a quieter voice which I had tried to tell her earlier and that she needn’t boss people around. She became quiet and watched the children playing. We were all hoping these kids would not fall into the pond. Their parents, like so many parents today were not making their unruly children follow the rules.
After we were done eating I said my goodbyes and walked back around the lake glad I had made the effort to see Red’s family. I considered walking back through the butterfly exhibit but decided to go the long way around the lake before heading for Del Ray, my stopping place for tonight.
As I came around the last bend I heard a band playing and realized it was the Off Kilter Band. This immediately gave me goose bumps as my direction and timing were perfect once again. I loved this band and the last time Red and I were at the park together we sat and listened to their entire show. They’ve been playing at Epcot for years and are not only talented on the electric guitar, bass, keyboard, full drum set, and have an extremely talented bag pipe player, they’re not too bad to look at either.
I sat and listened till they were finished with their last song. As I walked away I shed a tear for my dear Red, who was there in spirit but couldn’t reach out and hold my hand. He was definitely reaching out and had hold of my heart.
I exited the park and boarded the shuttle. I smiled when I saw the tattoo on the woman sitting in front of me. The butterfly on her shoulder was beautiful and so was Spirit World’s message.
I drove to Del Ray and spent the night with a healer friend I have been doing health seminars with for many years. I slept well and as I was writing notes in my journal she began telling me her 7 year old daughter had had a dream last night that she lived on butterfly farm. I find it simply amazing how in tune children are with the world around them. We have so much to learn from them.
I drove the familiar road south and as I headed through Florida City decided to take the Card Sound Bridge. It is a little longer but I was in no hurry and happy to be almost in the Florida Keys, one of my homes for many years.
NEXT CHAPTER